Top 5 Most Frequently Asked Questions as A Labor & Delivery Nurse

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Hey friends! I frequently do Q&As over on Instagram on my page @alifeinlabor. These Q&As come from question boxes in my stories and they range from anything including TTC, pregnancy, birth, breastfeeding, and taking care of babies. Today I wanted to do a rapid fire version of my TOP 5 most frequently asked questions for the entire year of 2023! This is the result…

5. When and how to wean a By from their sleep sack or blanket

how do I transition Baby out of the sleep sack? He hates the sack but also hates blankets. 

If baby hates his sleep sack, there is no reason to continue it! Not every baby needs to have a sleep sack or blanket to sleep well at night. As long as they are dressed appropriately for the temperature in the room, a sleep sack or blanket isn't necessary. If your baby prefers to sleep without either, weaning from a sleep sack cold turkey is absolutely a fine option.

If cold-turkey weaning is difficult on your baby because they are used to having that extra layer, I recommend using a sleep sack with legs! They are a cool innovative way to give baby more freedom of movement while still giving them that extra layer of comfort and warmth that they are used to.

Do I need to stop using sleep sacks when baby can stand in the crib?

Nope! You can use a sleep sack for as long as you can find one that fits your toddler. They even help prevent your growing toddler from climbing out of the crib and hurting themselves. If your baby is comfortable in their sleep sack, you can keep it!

At what age can you use a pillow and blanket in the crib? (also when can I use a lovey?)

Personally, I offer a lovey within the first year. Usually when I wean my baby from the swaddle because they are able to roll over in their sleep, I offer a lovey to keep them comfortable and feeling safe. Make sure your lovey is sleep safe, has only a small blanket attached that can't cover or wrap around your baby, and preferably has breathable material like muslin.

Offering a blanket is usually appropriate when your baby turns one year old. As long as my babies were easily moving about in their crib and strong enough to remove a blanket if it were to cover them, I was comfortable giving my one year old a blanket to sleep with.

Small toddler pillows might be appropriate for your two year old. But often, young toddlers don't need or prefer to sleep on a pillow until they are older. If they are sleeping well without one, you may not need to think about it until they grow out of their crib an into a toddler bed.

4. How can I get into labor before my induction?

I'm past my due date. How can I induce labor before getting induced? First time mom!

There isn't going to be one secret that's going to work for everyone. Inductions can be really long and difficult even with labor inducing medications. So prior to an induction, it's not always going to be straight forward or simple to get your body to go into labor before it's fully ready to do so. But if you're looking for some quick tips that can help you along and possibly prime your cervix and get you as close to labor as possible before you get induced, check out this post on how to induce yourself naturally.

How to prepare body for necessary induction as a first time mom?

Similar to my answer above, start with prepping your body using those 17 tips listed in the blog post I linked above. These tips can help soften, prime, and even dilate your cervix a little bit before labor starts. Even if you don't get yourself to go into full-blown active labor right away, priming your cervix and getting your body ready for labor can be a huge help and make all the difference in the world during your induction.

How to get labour naturally going before an induction?

Sometimes, if you're being induced early (like at 38-39 weeks), it's going to be really hard to get yourself to go into labor before that point. But if you're attempting to encourage your body to go into labor once your due date has come and gone and you're just trying to avoid an induction for “post-dates”, it might be a little bit more successful. Download the “Going Into Labor Cheatsheet” to get a 3-day blueprint guide to how you'll successfully put yourself into labor once your body has gotten the memo that it's time.

3. How Can I get My Labor to Start. I'm so done.

40 +5 & losing my mind waiting…tips?

The stress of “losing your mind” and going crazy waiting for labor to start might just be the thing that is keeping labor at bay. Relaxation and calm confidence in your body's ability to go into labor at the right time is going to be the key to allowing your body to start the labor process in a calm, relaxed state. Try your best to alternate movement with rest and make sure that you're doing what you can to keep anxiety and stress low so that your not counteracting labor hormones with stress hormones that slow and inhibit labor.

39 and a half weeks pregnant and worried I won't go into labor naturally. I have my induction set for next Sunday. 

The fact that so many women fear that they won't go into labor on their own is a product of our society that perpetually tells women that they are not good enough and they need help and intervention in order to do what their body was built to do. Our culture tells women that they “should” be in labor or showing signs of labor before their due date. This is not true at all!

If you're not in labor by your due date or even past your due date, there is nothing wrong with you and your body hasn't failed you. Your due date is just an educated guess based on other women's bodies and babies…not yours. Your body is different and will go into labor and start to dilate when the time is right. Don't put pressure on your body to go into labor at a very narrow and specific time (like by 40 weeks on the dot). Instead, give yourself grace and realize that it's more of a “due month” than a “due date”.

Most women go into labor sometime between 39 and 41 weeks without any intervention. So if you go into labor ON YOUR DUE DATE, your pretty much right in the middle of that range…not at the end.

The worry that you feel that you won't meet this imaginary deadline is not your fault. But do what you can to let that worry go because it might just be holding your labor back even more.

39 weeks today and miserable. How do I get this baby OUT!?

Being at the end of your pregnancy is so tough! It can be exhausting and sometimes even physically painful to carry a full-term pregnancy for weeks. But it's worth it! Your body and your baby are holding onto this pregnancy for a reason. There is likely something that your baby is needing from you right now to finish off their development prior to birth. The best thing that you can do is be patient as you wait for labor to start on it's own. Although it absolutely feels like it, 39 weeks is not the end of the road for most mamas. Hang in there!

2. What can I do about middle of the night wakings?

9m old waking 2x/night to nurse back to sleep, she can put herself to sleep for naps and bedtime.

This is really developmentally normal for this age! Although a 9 month old baby can sleep through the night, they often won't. It is ok and normal to continue to feed your baby at night, especially if you're nursing. It sounds to me like you're doing an excellent job teaching your baby about happy sleep habits because she is able to put herself to sleep on her own but she still trusts that her mama will come to her aid when she needs a little extra calories or cuddles in the middle of the night.

Believe it or not, your baby is most likely decrease and even wean themselves from their night wakings on their own in time. If you're ok continuing to nurse your baby to sleep in the middle of the night, then you can continue doing it without the fear of “ruining” her sleep or creating “bad habits” that they will never outgrow. That's just not going to happen!

8m old. Habit feed at 4am. How to drop?

Although this is developmentally normal and appropriate at this age, I completely understand if you're feeling frustrated by it and hope that it stops! My recommendation is to see if it's actually a habit by decreasing the time you spend with your baby during that wake. If you normally spend 15 minutes with her at 4 am, decrease it to 10 minutes..then 5 and see how your baby responds. Keep decreasing the time and effort that you put into this wake and your baby will eventually learn that it's not worth it to wake up anymore!

Is it normal for a 5 month old to not sleep through the night when EBF? How do I get her to?

This is extremely normal! Don't let our culture tell you that your baby “should” be sleeping through the night just because some babies do sleep through the night at this age. It is very common for a five month old to still need calories in the middle of the night to get them all the way to morning with a comfortable tummy.

One way to encourage “sleeping through the night” is to cluster feed your baby frequently leading up to bedtime and then even do a “dream feed” right before you go to bed yourself. So if you put her down for sleep at 7pm but you don't go to bed yourself until 10 pm, go in and nurse her at 10 before you turn in for the night to encourage a longer stretch while you're asleep.

My 3.5 month old seeems to cluster feed in early morning (3-6am). Any tips? Is this normal?

This is so normal and common. Babies often have their deepest sleep earlier in the night and then their sleep becomes more wakeful and “light” in the early mornings around 3-6 am. It's common for babies to want to wake frequently to cluster feed and fall right back to sleep and not quite be up for the day yet at that time. The best thing to do at this age is to continue to allow the feeding at that time but try to make sure that they are getting a full feeding in before they fall back to sleep. maybe encourage them to eat from both breasts if they typically just take one side to see if that can stretch them until morning after their 3 am waking.

How to help 5 month connect sleep cycles at night? He's waking every 3-4 hours. 

If you believe that your baby is having all of their needs met (they are fed, cuddled, and dry) and all they need is a little bit of help connecting one sleep cycle to another in the middle of the night, I encourage you to try a “pause”. When your baby wakes up after 3 hrs and you believe that they are not hungry, wet, or needing connection, go ahead and give a pause before going into their room. Let them cry only for a short time and for as long as your instincts tell you that it's ok. If you notice that as you allow them to fuss, their cry is getting softer, quieter, and more spaced out, you might notice that they were actually still asleep and allowing them to cry for a moment allowed them to connect their sleep cycle and avoid disturbing their sleep by going to them.

For more in-depth information, tips, tricks, and strategies on infant sleep, go here.

1. How To Have a successful VBAC

If you want to have any successful vaginal birth, even one after a cesarean birth, the biggest and most impactful thing that you can do for your chances is to prep and prepare your body throughout your pregnancy. Care for your body, your uterus, your cervix, your endurance, and your pain coping abilities as if you were depending on your body to do it without any intervention whatsoever. Even if you fully plan on accepting intervention such as augmentation or pain medications, it's important to take a birth course that will teach you what you can do to optimize your birth using strategies that will prime your cervix, prepare your uterus, and give you the confidence to allow your body to labor spontaneously without intervening on your natural labor process.

To learn more, head here.